


Toon Time

by Genderfluid_Puddle_Of_Soup



Category: Linked Universe - Fandom, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms
Genre: Crack, Gen, Linked Universe (Legend of Zelda), Rated for swearing, Video Game Mechanics, Wind and Legend have emotions that they need to express, and weird stuff keeps happening to them, as always
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:28:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28265436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Genderfluid_Puddle_Of_Soup/pseuds/Genderfluid_Puddle_Of_Soup
Summary: The new Link looks weird. His head is the size of a watermelon, and his face looks like a drawing. But they shouldn’t have to worry about that affecting them, right? Wrong.
Comments: 59
Kudos: 144





	1. Toonemia

Sky had never really minded the portals that his new-found group of traveling companions used for travel. Sure, they made all his limbs feel a little numb and his face feel warm, but compared to free falling off his Loftwing and through the Cloud Barrier, the portals were hardly terrifying.

But something felt wrong about this portal. There was still the tingling in his fingers, like he had been out in the cold and was sticking them into warm water, and he could feel his face warming up just like normal. But still, there was a knot of anxiety in his stomach that wouldn’t go away. Something was definitely wrong.

Sky nearly slammed straight into Legend’s back as he popped out the other side.

“Hey, why didn’t you-” Sky looked up to the new time they had landed in. It looked wrong, like someone had drawn the world for a child’s coloring book. All eight members of their group were looking around in a daze, trying to get their bearings. The only ones who didn’t seem worried were Time and Warriors, who were whispering to each other as they looked out to the sea. 

Which was bright, solid blue. With little white squiggles on the surface.

“Hylia has finally forsaken us! This is what hell looks like.” Legend declared, plopping himself down on the (very flat looking) grass, and running his fingers through it.

“Woah,” Sky whispered as he sat to join Legend. “This stuff is the same texture as my Zelda’s old Remlit plushie. It’s so soft.”

Four leaned down next to them, “This _is_ weird, but we can’t draw a conclusion about the entirety of this world's grass from one patch under Legend’s butt.”

“Hey, guys!” Wild yelled from where he stood next to Hyrule by the cliff. “We’re near a village. Come look!”

Sure enough, as Sky looked over the cliff, there was a small village built by the shore.

“Look’s kind of like a really bright version of Lurelin Village,” Wild whispered.

“Alright, boys,” Time called, “who wants to go scare the locals?”

Seven hands shot up.

* * *

They were just nearing the bottom of the cliff when a boy in a blue tunic came charging towards them, ready for battle. He pointed his sword at them, and asked, “Who the fuck are you? What the fuck are you? How did you get here?”

Warriors stepped forward, “I take it you don’t recognize me?”

The boy glared, “Why would I?”

Sky could have sworn he heard Time whisper “spoilers” under his breath.

“Not important,” Warriors smiled. “It was a long time ago.”

The boy glared at Warriors and tightened the grip on his sword. “You still haven’t answered my questions.”

“We’re all named Link, and we’re here to ask you to join our Link squad, or ‘The Chain’ as some of us have been calling it,” Time said, stepping forward.

“I’ve been calling us ‘The Bois,’” Wild yelled from the back.

“That can’t be Link,” Hyrule whispered next to Sky. “He’s got to be, like ten years old.”

“Kind of hard to tell with how weird he looks,” Sky whispered back. “And weren’t you ten when you started?”

“I was eleven, so shut the fuck up.”

“You’re _all_ named Link?” The kid asked. “What? Did you get here by some magic portal?”

“Yes, actually.” Four stepped in front of both Warriors and Time, kicking them in the shins as he went. “But I think we are all ignoring the bigger issue here. You look weird compared to us. And vice versa, of course.”

Thanks to all his stepping and kicking, Four had gotten very close to the new Link, and Sky was more than a little uncomfortable seeing them right next to each other. Link was taller than Four, partially because his head took up a third of his body. And his face literally, actually looked like a drawing that Zelda had done of Sky when they were twelve, and it kept shifting expressions as he seemed to be taking in the rest of them. Next to Four’s cool collectedness, it was jarring.

“Okay… So you’re all Link, and you look super weird. Prove to me you’re safe.”

And that was Sky’s queue.

“Have you ever heard of the Master Sword?” he asked, stepping in front of Time and Warriors and _not_ kicking them in the shins.

“Of course I have. It was my sword.”

“Excellent! I have it!”

This was going so much better than when they recruited Hyrule. No Master Sword. No spin attack. _Orange_ rupees. Hyrule’s era was a unique kind of mess.

“How’d you get it from the bottom of the ocean?” Link tilted his head, making the most cartoonish confused face possible.

“It’s at the bottom of the ocean!” Sky saw red for a second. 

Oh wait, that was just Four’s tunic as he stepped between them.

“Weird version of the Master Sword,” he said to Link. “Weird time travel shenanigans,” he said to Sky in the tone one would use while patiently explaining something to a child.

“Oh yeah,” Sky said as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Anyway, here she is.” He pulled the Master Sword out of its sheath and held it in front of him.

“Okay, that’s good enough for me,” Link said. “20 rupees says I’m still asleep anyway.”

“Great! Now that that’s finally out of the way,” Four said turning to Link, “hi, I’m Link, but I currently go by Four.”

“Oh, we get nicknames?” Link asked.

“We’ve mostly been using our hero titles, if you have one.”

“In that case, I’m Wind. Nice to meet you.”

Wind stuck out his hand to shake Four’s but the second they touched, Four turned weird too. 

It was different from Wind’s weird. Four’s multicolor tunic was gone, replaced by a traditional green tunic and cap. And his hair was shorter. Oh! And Sky definitely should have mentioned this first, he looked like he was made of little blocks. 

“What the-” Four jumped back and looked down at himself then looked back up at Wind. “I have no idea what you did, but I hate it.”

“Your voice sounds all garbly,” Wild said, creeping closer like he wanted to poke to newly pointy parts of Four.

“Wild, no touchy,” Twilight said from the back.

“But Twi, weird pokey thing.”

“No, Wild. Twilight’s right. I could be contagious,” Four said backing up towards Wind.

“Exactly! I want to see!” And with that, Wild lunged at Four, touching the tip of his boot as Four tripped back onto Wind. 

When Wild stood up and faced the group, everyone gasped. His scars were completely gone and his hair was only shoulder length.

Wild looked Twilight right in the eyes with the smuggest look possible, and mouthed something at him.

Twilight sighed. “Cub, if you want to gloat, you have to actually talk.”

Wild froze and mouthed some more.

“We can’t hear a thing you’re saying, Wild.” Time said.

“Maybe I can heal them?” Hyrule said. 

“Absolutely not.” Legend put a hand on Hyrule’s shoulder. “You have to _touch_ people to heal them, and then you’ll get Wind’s disease too. No offense, Wind.” 

“None taken, I’m still pretty sure I’m dreaming. Wouldn’t be the first time.”

“But then I can heal myself, and then we can try and figure out the cause.” Hyrule argued.

Legend scowled. “Fine. But be careful, Rule.”

Hyrule walked towards Wild, mumbling a spell under his breath. He lifted glowing fingers to Wild’s left cheek, only to become even blockier than Four the second they touched.

Wild mouthed something that looked an awful lot like “cool” before poking at Hyrule’s nose.

Hyrule jerked away, and made a series of high pitched beeping noises before moving his hands up to cover his mouth. 

“So no one else is allowed to touch any of the infected,” Time said.

Hyrule turned to them and made more beeping noises.

“Rule, we have no idea what you’re saying. Your mouth isn’t even moving,” Legend sighed.

Hyrule beeped. Then drew a frowny face in the sand. Unfortunately for him, it seemed like his movement was more limited by his blocky form, so the frowny face ended up looking rectangular too.

“Healing isn’t working?” Warriors guessed.

Hyrule beeped again.

“...I’m going to take that as a yes.”

Legend started pacing while cursing the goddesses and also something called the Windfish. 

“There is no way this is real life! I remember last time, you oversized piece of tuna. Send your fucking owl so that we can wake you back up and I can go back to therapy.”

“What’s an owl?” Wind asked.

“It’s a type of bird,” Time said. “A really annoying one at that. They talk forever, and will repeat themselves over and over and over and...”

Sky knew that Time held a lot of baggage, being the oldest in the group, but looking at the haunted expression on the Old Man’s face made him finally realize the true weight that he carried. 

Warriors seemed to catch onto Time’s spiral as well, placing a hand on his shoulder and whispering in Time’s ear. 

“So how are we going to fix this?” Legend asked, finally done with his pacing. “Half of us can’t touch each other!”

“Maybe it’s only because we’re in Wind’s world? And everyone will go back to normal once we go through the next portal?” Sky suggested.

“It’s certainly possible,” Warriors agreed. “During the War of Eras we had several people who looked odd by my time’s standards. Perhaps Wind’s era is simply trying, although failing, to force us to fit its aesthetic?”

“In that case there is not much for us to do but wait,” Time said. “Wind, I suggest you go explain to your village what’s going on and prepare yourself for another quest. The rest of us can set up camp out here so we don’t scare anyone.” He drew a line in the sand with his boot. “This is the Wind Disease line. No one is allowed to cross it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


	2. Pixilitis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bois leave Outset and start the adventure.

A week after they had arrived on Outset, Legend and Hyrule were talking from opposite sides of the line. Or, they were trying to talk. It was more like Legend was asking yes or no questions, and Hyrule was pointing to (rectangular looking) smiley and frowny faces on the ground. 

“Are you sure you’re not sore? You haven’t sat down in a week.” 

Smiley face. 

“Wait, does that mean you’re sore or you feel fine? Frowny for sore.” 

Smiley face. 

“This is the most fucked up fever dream I’ve ever had, and that's saying something.” 

Frowny face. 

“I should be comforting you. You definitely got the worst variation of Wind Disease.”

Hyrule made a single beep sound before a portal appeared directly between them, and Legend nearly jumped for joy. 

“Yes! You go wake your side, I’ll get mine. We get to leave!” 

A few minutes later, the whole group was assembled on their respective sides of the line. 

“I feel like we should let Wind’s side go first and finally let them get cured,” Sky said. 

“Agreed. After you,” Time said, gesturing towards the portal. 

Wild stepped forward and with a little salute and a wink, stepped through. He was quickly followed by Four and Hyrule. 

Wind stood in front of the portal hyping himself up. 

“You okay?” Time asked. 

“Yeah. It’s just… scary dark magic portal to an alternate world. Need a minute. Even though I still think I’m dreaming.”

After taking three big breaths, he closed his eyes and charged.

That just left the five of them without Wind Disease shuffling awkwardly in the sand, trying to decide who should go next.

With an irritated groan, Legend stepped forward. “I’ll go. I’m usually first through anyway.”

Going through The Shadow’s portals, in Legend’s opinion, felt like going through deep water. He had to hold his breath and close his eyes, and there was a weird pressure on his ears. But Legend had been through countless portals before. These ones were tame compared to the cracks that led to Lorule; he could swear he heard a baby’s cry every time he used one of those. 

As the pressure on his ears lessened and he reached the end, he took a big step forward and began to open his eyes, only to slam into Wind, whose head was still the size of a watermelon.

“Fuck!” Legend jolted back towards the portal, only to hit Warriors. They both toppled to the ground right in front of the portal, where Time, Twilight, and Sky proceeded to trip over them on the way out.

Everyone stood up very slowly. Or maybe it just felt slow to Legend because getting accidentally dog piled by four adult hylians (in armor) did not feel fun. Eventually though, Legend was unpinned from under Warriors and stood up to see Wild silently laughing like a bokoblin.

Glancing down, Legend realized that he was now blocky too. Not quite as blocky as Hyrule, thankfully, but that left a very important question.

“Can you understand me?”

“Sure thing. Your voice is more distorted than Four’s, but it’s still words,” Twi smiled. 

“Then why is Wild laughing so hard? And why are the four of you fine?”

Wild paused for a moment to lift up his left sideburn, then point at Legend, then go back to laughing.

“My hair? What's wrong with my- Oh Farore.” It was all pink. Every strand that he could see. This hadn’t happened since his first adventure. “At least my clothes are about the same color.”

“It is odd that the rest of us are fine though. I definitely touched Legend when he was like that,” Warriors said.

“Maybe you’re immune,” Four said. “Didn’t you say you have experience with strange people from different time periods?”

Warriors cupped his chin in thought. “Maybe. I don’t suppose the Old Man will let me try touching Legend again.”

“It’s your decision, Captain. Your risk to take.”

Warriors crossed the invisible line they had established during the conversation, walked up to Legend, and ruffled his hair. Nothing happened.

“Ouch, you’re pointy,” he said, rubbing his hand against his chest.

“Then don’t touch me again,” Legend growled.

“Warriors, you’re our new most valuable teammate,” Time said. “Let’s start setting up a camp for the night. We’ve got a lot to plan if we’re going to be traveling like this.”

* * *

Green was having a very bad day. When Four had first touched Wind a week ago, it had taken all Green's control not to panic on the spot. He was used to the feeling of being his own person; he was also used to being a fourth of a whole. He was _not_ used to being his own person with his brothers stuck inside his head.

The first night that everyone had slept on Outset, Green had lay awake, looking at the stars and whispering to Red, Blue, and Vio. The three of them were doing much better than him. Apparently for them, this was like being Four, but with more independent thought. There had been a long discussion about whether or not to tell everyone what had happened.

The fight had mainly been Red begging Green to tell the others while Blue and Vio explained why it was a bad idea. Vio with logic, Blue with stubbornness. Green had ultimately agreed not to say anything because he was the best at imitating Four. (Blue said that was because he was the boring one. Red said it was because he shared Four’s level head.)

And that’s how Green ended up spending a week pretending to be four times the person he actually was.

But, the act was supposed to end when they went through the portal. Green was supposed to slip back into semi-consciousness and make this quest Four’s problem again. But now they were in a new world that was clearly not Wind’s, and he was still blocky. Still acting. Still Green.

His brothers had given him countless apologies over the situation, and he knew they meant them all, but he felt twitchy. The closest he could to pins and needles while like this, he supposed.

Luckily for him, “Four” and all the other infected had been sent to look for firewood. How poor Hyrule was supposed to get any, he didn’t know, but it gave the uninfected a chance to set up camp without worrying about bumping into them.

As soon as he thought he was far enough from everyone, he started kicking a nearby tree, and because it was just that kind of day, he started punching it too.

 _Green, stop. I can feel you doing that and it hurts,_ Red chided.

 _What are you talking about, I can’t feel a thing,_ Blue said.

 _Me neither,_ Vio added.

“Red, can you feel this?” Green asked as he rolled across the forest floor. Rolling had become very easy while blocky, which Vio had said was counterintuitive.

_Yes. I’ve been able to sort of feel everything all week, but today it’s really clear. It feels like my skin is buzzing, and I don’t even have skin right now!_

“Can all of you feel it?”

_Nope._

_No._

“That’s… weird. I’m not sure how much longer I can keep this up, especially knowing how it's affecting Red. I think we should tell them. We still have the Four Sword. We could just split.”

 _Absolutely not!_ Twin voices responded.

“We can discuss it tonight. I do actually need to collect firewood.”

Green kept walking around the forest, picking up sticks and putting them in his hat. None of them really knew where it had come from. Link hadn’t worn a hat when he was little, Ezlo had been a hood, and Four still wore one in honor of him. But neither Green nor Four had blue eyes either, so he just chalked it up to Wind Disease weirdness.

With a hat full of firewood, Green started rolling back to camp, only stopping when Red complained that it was giving him a headache. Right as he got back, he felt the Four Sword heat up from his back. A wave of warmth washed over him, and next thing Green knew, he was no longer a person with a body.

Red stumbled forward for a second before looking down at the color of his tunic sleeves. With as big of a smile as he could manage, he turned to everybody else who was back.

“Hi, I’m Red! Vio would probably come up with a really good lie for why that just happened, but he’s powerless right now. Want me to tell you the true strength of the Four Sword?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


	3. 8-bittrophy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyrule has been vibing.

Red knew that his brothers were going to be angry with him later. Actually, they were already angry with him. Blue was cursing more violently than when they first met Tingle, and he could hear Vio and Green’s groans echoing through his skull. How had Green managed to deal with this for a full week? He knew they should have told everyone sooner.

Time seemed the least phased by “Four’s” sudden change, which Red had expected. Time’s poker face was unbeatable, both metaphorically and literally. Before this whole mess had started, Four, Legend, and Time had been in a three way poker rivalry that Time had slowly been winning.

“Sure… Red. What do you want to tell us?” The Old Man sat down, like he was preparing for whatever shock he was about to receive.

A headache was building in Red’s mind, Blue and Vio working themselves into a panicked frenzy while Green failed to calm them down.

“You know, I think it may be better if I just show you,” Red said with a smile, headache turning to a migraine as Green joined in the panic. Red really wished they had been able to do this together, all in agreement, but he couldn’t pretend to be Four as well as Green, he couldn’t lie as well as Vio, and he couldn’t muscle through things like Blue. It was time.

Red grabbed the Four Sword from his back, and muscle memory took over. A very stilted, very dramatic version of muscle memory. He held the sword in front of his face and raised it to the sky. And one became four, but slightly to the left.

Instead of blinding light engulfing him as they snapped apart, a much tamer, much less brilliant light surrounded him. And instead of snapping apart, being one person one moment and four the next, it took them several agonizingly slow seconds to slide apart. Red could feel Green and Blue’s heads passing through his, which felt so, so uncomfortably weird.

But then they were all there. All four of them. Red took a moment to enjoy their company, even if it was tainted by Wind Disease and spilled secrets. There was always something special about being together after a long time apart. (Or was it apart after a long time together? Red didn’t want to bog himself down with technicalities.)

His moment was quickly cut short by a screaming Blue, who tackled Red to the ground and sent them rolling. (Green had been right, rolling was much easier when they were like this.)

As he tumbled away, Red could see Green collapsing onto the ground, leaving Vio to deal with a very confused set of Links.

* * *

Vio wanted nothing more than to join Green in flopping on the floor and giving up on everything. Red had split them; this should be Red’s problem. But Blue had gone and tackled Red, and now they were rolling away like a tumbleweed.

He could make Green stand up and help him. Green was the leader after all. But Green also looked really tired and pitiful. Vio could do this. He could play the cool one. Hold off looking down at his own hands until after he explained the Four Sword. And  _ then _ he could collapse next to Green.

“So… This is the power of the Four Sword,” he started. Might as well make it obvious that turning into four people was the intended effect. 

Twilight looked at him very hard for a second before saying, “Is your name Purple?” 

“Vio, actually.”

“He ruined our pattern,” Green moaned with his face still smushed into the dirt. “And now he gets mad every time someone gets his name wrong.”

“I’m not mad, Green, and if you want to comment, you could stand up and help.” 

Green adjusted himself so that he was looking up from the ground. “I just spent a week pretending to be Link, and the second I got a break, Red ruined it. I get to lie on the ground as long as I want.”

“Pretending to be Link!” Sky seemed very alarmed. “What happened to Four? Is he okay? Are you okay? It’s very nice to meet you, by the way.”

Vio looked down to Green, who now had his eyes closed and was doing a very good job of ignoring them all.

“Guess I’m on my own,” Vio sighed. “We aren’t sure why, but something weird happened to us when Four got Wind Disease. Usually it’s one of him or four of us, but we got stuck in some sort of in between state.”

Red and Blue finally came running back over.

“Hello again!” Red chirped!

“Hello, Red. Vio was just explaining the Four Sword to us,” Time said.

“Oh, did he mention the phantom feelings?”

“Red, I told you I never got those.”

“Yeah, but that was when Green was the body. I thought you could have gotten them when we switched.”

“Actually, I got them,” Blue grumbled. “And I’ll admit, it felt weird, and I understand why you wanted to tell the others.”

“Green, did you feel anything?” Vio was pretty sure Green was almost asleep.

“Nope. Leave me alone.”

Vio started pacing. Walking felt weird, but he still refused to look at himself. “Why Blue? There has to be a pattern.”

“Maybe Blue would have been next if we had switched again!” Red suggested.

“Perhaps, but why that order?”

“That’s the order we were standing in when we first drew the Four Sword, brainiac,” Blue said.

“How can you possibly remember that?”

“Just because you’re ‘the smart one’ doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t have a brain. Plus, we were just standing in that order when we split. How do you think I tackled Red so fast?”

“Sorry to interrupt, but are your voices normally such different pitches?”

“Warriors, what does that have to do with anything right now?” Twilight asked.

“It’s bothering me! Vio’s voice is much deeper than Red’s, and they look exactly the same!”

“Except for the tunics and hats,” Sky added.

“Well yeah, obviously.”

“Our voices aren’t normally that different? Right Blue?”

“Red always sounds like he’s about to break into song, and you’re always mumbling. But pitch wise? No, I think we’re usually about the same.”

“Right now, I’d say that Vio’s voice is exactly 25% lower than Red’s,” Time said.

Everyone (including Green) gave him a look.

“The wisdom of old age,” he explained with a dismissive gesture.

“It’s probably more Wind Disease weirdness,” Red said. “Maybe it’s to make up for the fact that my freckles are gone and that Blue’s hair is blonder and that Vio doesn’t look like he just pulled an all nighter in the forge!”

“You’ve done that too, Red,” Vio countered.

“Yeah, but when I do it, I don’t get bags so dark, they scare customers away!”

“You know what? I don’t have to deal with this. You’re back, Red. You can finish explaining anything I missed.” And with that, Vio looked down at his hands and promptly fainted from the shock of how blocky they were. 

Green finally sat up. “Sweet, we broke Vio. I’m taking a nap. No setting anything on fire or starting fights.” He then lay back down, closed his eyes, and fell asleep. A little speech bubble reading, “Zz” appeared above his head.

* * *

Hyrule knew that he shouldn't be coping with this so well. He definitely had the worst variation of Wind Disease, and everyone knew it. He should have cared that everything sounded distorted or that he could only move his limbs at specific angles. It definitely should have bothered him no one could understand him. And he was almost angry that he couldn't slash his sword anymore.

But if Hyrule was being honest, he was pretty happy like this.

All that stuff definitely sucked. He missed being able to sit down. And sleep, he really missed sleep. But there were plenty of good things about Wind Disease too. For one thing, since he could barely move, He didn’t have to collect firewood. No one had actually told him to stop, but his first attempt had been pretty disastrous.

He hadn’t been able to bend over and pick up sticks or slash at dead tree branches, and even if he had managed to collect anything, he couldn’t bend his arms to hold them. Hyrule had been miserable when he came back to camp, walking with the same arm-pumping stride he seemed to be stuck in, but when he got back, there had been four Fours sleeping in a close, huddled row. So everyone else was probably too busy with their own problems to bother dealing with his.

Hyrule was really enjoying having the free time to wander the forest of each new camp site. They didn’t know where they were, probably between Heroes, and he hadn’t gotten to wander much since starting this quest. By now, someone had probably noticed that he never brought back any firewood, but it’s not like they could tell him to stop. Half the Links couldn’t touch him, and no one could understand him.

That was another bonus to being made of blocks! He could talk as much as he wanted without worrying about what the others were thinking. If it weren’t for the whole having traveling companions thing, these past few days would have been the closest he had felt in ages to his early travels. Some nagging part of his mind wanted to say in decades, but that didn’t make any sense. He hadn’t even known how to use a sword a decade ago.

But since they had nothing to do besides walk, and Hyrule had nothing to do besides talk, that’s what he did. He talked about the trail and the weather and the leaves. He reminisced in stories about Dawn and Aurora, learning magic, and finding the countless secrets of his home. It was great! He always hated how silent he seemed to get around other people.

But glancing up at Warriors’s face a week after traveling in this new Hyrule, he realized that maybe it hadn’t been great for everyone else. He and Warriors had been traveling with each other the whole time. Everyone was worried about Hyrule getting hurt in an ambush, and Warriors had been acting as a human Wind Disease line. Hyrule knew his voice sounded like high pitched beeping noises to the others, and the more he talked now, the more he could see Warriors clench his jaw and fiddle with his scarf. Oops.

So Hyrule decided to become the silent protagonist he usually was. Legend and one of Four’s colors (either Blue or Vio, he couldn’t tell) were walking behind him and discussing how Wind Disease had affected their items. That seemed interesting. Hyrule was having trouble hearing everything they were saying, but he was pretty sure the main point was that their hammers didn’t crush monsters in big booms anymore, and they were angry about it. Hyrule hadn’t actually tried using his hammer since getting Wind Disease. Maybe he could do that tonight at camp.

He was so focused on trying to listen, that he didn’t notice the people in front of him stopping until he rammed into Warriors’s back.

“That’s why we have you there, Captain,” Time said from the front of the group.

“Why’d we stop?” Wind yelled from the back. He had been stuck in the rear all week as the only infected Link with a clear enough voice to reach the front of their 12 person chain.

“It’s a portal!” Sky yelled back. “We were talking about letting those of us without Wind Disease go first this time so we don’t get a Legend repeat.”

Legend pushed his way in front of Hyrule. “Sure, just have Warriors go last, and then we’ll wait a minute on this side before starting again.”

With a set of nods, Time, Twilight, and Sky all walked through the portal. 

Warriors looked back at all of them before saying, “Count to a hundred before you go through. I don’t want to get crushed.” And then he stepped into the portal.

Wild started counting on his fingers, holding them out to the group so that they could see as he mouthed along.

“Does anyone care what order we go in?” Legend asked.

“You can go first,” Wind sayed.

“Cool, that’s all I really cared about.”

Hyrule shuffled in behind Legend. He wanted to get through this portal as fast as he could. He hated the feeling of being inside them. Once Wild finally  _ finally _ got to a hundred, Legend started through the portal, Hyrule right behind him.

Hyrule didn’t like keeping his eyes open while going through the portals. The magic always felt too dark, too oppressive. It was thick and sticky and made him feel like he was getting syrup on his face, and even worse, in his hair. But he couldn’t close his eyes anymore. He hadn’t closed his eyes in two weeks.

Which meant he got a perfect view of what happened to Legend.

Legend had become blocky after getting Wind Disease. That seemed to be the most common effect. With Legend's distorted voice and Hyrule’s distorted hearing, it took all Hyrule’s concentration to understand Legend when he spoke. And his hair had been pink, which Hyrule thought looked kind of cool, even if Legend seemed upset about it.

But something was wrong. Legend was losing color. His shirt was turning grey. And his hair was turning black! The small blocks looked like they were clumping together to form larger ones. With a start, Hyrule realized that Legend was now as blocky as him.

And then Legend was out the other side of the portal with Hyrule right on his heels.

The veteran wasted no time panicking once he was away from the portal. “Why am I grayscale? How am I grayscale? I didn’t touch anyone. Or anything. I don’t think I can feel my feet...”

Hyrule took a few steps towards him. Maybe he could offer comfort? Legend wasn’t much for physical affection though. He would just say something, even if it wasn’t understandable.

“It’s okay, Legend. We’ll figure it out.”

Legend waved him off. “In a minute, Rule. I need more panic time.” A second later, his head shot up. “I can understand you. Can you understand me?”

“Yeah.” Hyrule really wished he could smile. “Your voice sounds completely clear, too.”

“Wait a minute, if you can understand me, and I can understand you,” Legend turned to the others, “Can they understand me?”

Time was staring down at both of them, and after a solid ten seconds said, “I’m going to guess you asked me something.”

“There’s two of them now,” Warriors moaned.

Sky shoved his side. “Quiet. Hyrule’s probably been lonely without anyone to talk to.”

“You may have had the luxury of staying in the front of the line all week, but I’ve been listening to Hyrule go beep boop for days. He’s fine.”

Legend turned back to Hyrule, “Why  _ have _ you been talking so much?”

“I like talking to myself. It was really nice to do it without worrying about everyone listening in.”

“Huh. Sorry for ruining your fun.”

“Are you kidding? Talking to you is way more interesting! Like, what had you been saying earlier about hammers?”

Time cut their conversation short, “Now that we’re all safely through, let’s keep going. I know these woods and can get us somewhere safe to rest by tomorrow.”

* * *

Time was furious. No, he was livid. He wasn’t sure whom with, but once he figured it out, they would feel great pain. Since he couldn’t enact his revenge at this moment, he would just think about how much he wanted to walk into the ocean and scream. Or the Lost Woods, now that that was an option.

He trudged through the woods, leading the boys towards Hyrule Field. Even from his spot in the front, he could hear Hyrule and Legend beeping at each other. Good for them. It was nice to hear that something good had come out of this otherwise miserable portal.

He didn’t know what he was going to do. They didn't know what caused Wind Disease, they had no idea how to undo it, and he was taking them home to Malon. Hylia help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed.


End file.
